Songs

Here's some songs I wrote, ranging between 3 years ago (the bad ones) and fairly recently (the not quite as bad ones).  Most of them aren't really done, but they're as finished as they're gonna get.

Bar Ghost

Wasn't all that long ago
Maybe just a year or so
Take a seat where you took my breath away
Fix a drink where you broke my heart
In a way you never went away
and we're calling it quits every day

Your ghost is sitting at the booth
My beer tastes like it's eighty proof
My head just ran its all time best and my poor heart can't keep up
Things I wished you'd never say
remembered just like yesterday
The way I like to lose my mind reminds me of my luck

Maybe it was something I said
or maybe it was something I didn't say
Maybe I was cursed to be cursed by you
Maybe I was blessed to have it the hard way

My decent into decency
Laugh and nod and smile at me
But I'll never miss my misery 
cos it's easy just to cry
I'm all worn out from being free
One partner short of monogamy
I hope I've got your sympathy
cos I'd gladly give you mine

And I don't hurt enough to justify this song
but I'm going to sing it anyway
and I hope you sing along
Cos like you said, it's not what I did wrong
What did I didn't do right?

Low Standard Competition

I Don't Need A Cigarette

Me Minus You

I never shed a tear
when I didn't have you near
'cause I dried up all my fear
soaking up my pillowcase

I lost a couple pounds
just from chasing you around
now I'm lying on the ground
so I guess you win the race

To think of how I thought of you
one hundred thousand thoughts of you
weren't enough to kill the blue
but still they played their part
I'll get over what you put me through
and there's still a lot that we can do
but I'd like it if you moved your shoe
'cause you're standing on my heart

Getting By

Down For the Count

forever
ended a week and a half ago
which marked the starting point
of another forever that's emptying his soul

"I wish things didn't have to be this way"
she said, and he said "Its ok"
but that's a wish that will never come true
and that's a voice that will never go away

3 a.m. he's out of bed
4 a.m. he's on the floor
he always slept so soundly with her
but he don't seem to be sleeping anymore

down for the count
out for the day
he's got nothing to hear
'cause she's got nothing to say

close the curtains
there goes the play
both the actors are leaving
but one wants to stay
this tale of romance is over
but the last act wasn't supposed to end this way

forever
forever together is forever without her now
and that's a lot of time to spend
thinking about her and thinking about how

those lips those eyes those hands
he used to hold every night
will never touch him again
mr. wrong has lost his mrs. right

down for the count
out for the day
he's got nothing to hear
'cause she's got nothing to say

close the curtains
there goes the play
both the actors are leaving
but one wants to stay
this tale of romance is over
but the last act wasn't supposed to end this way

the future
the future don't hold a candle to the past
and every day he sits and wonders
how does the meaning of forever change so fast?

his eyes are drying
his head is rising
he knows his misery won't last
but even so, he'll always wonder
how does the meaning of forever change so fast?

Two Months

Patience is a virtue
when you've nothing to look forward to
just sit and be yourself

err on the side of caution
wouldn't wanna be something
just sit and be yourself

Got my records and guitar
a complicated VCR
so I can miss my favorite shows
Got a girl who isn't mine
a couple months is just enough time
to remember all that I don't have

and I don't know

ask me how I'm doing
I won't know what to say to you
doesn't that sound fun?

I was feeling much better
two months ago today
everything's so relative

and irrelevant

when you're living day by day

Good memories are just that
it doesn't feel so good to remember what I had
the past gets weaker every day
what am I moving toward?  I'm just moving away.

From talking to me day to day
You'd think I didn't care
Think I was done
But I'll smoke this to the butt, and eat the filter
Then light another one

Then light another ten to one
I'm lost again
but I won't tell you so
too busy smoking me to talk
too busy getting up to walk

Yesterday and Tomorrow

Davey's ex-girlfriend was his girlfriend yesterday
she's the kind of girl who don't know what to say
so she told him what she thought would cause
the least amount of pain
"Davey it just ain't working out the way it should.
I'm sorry that I can't say why, but I'm leaving you for good."

Davey met Alicia one week after his loss
couple of drunken kids, their glazed eyes turned to gloss
smart and pretty, cute and funny
they really hit it off
He told her 'bout confusion, heartbreak, and seven nights of tears
she gave his head a shoulder and they passed out ear to ear

thirty pictures in a shoebox
thirty pictures of the past
thirty pictures of his ex
thirty pictures in the trash
thirty minutes later, Alicia's on the phone
thirty hours later her voice becomes a moan

Davey's broken heart ain't a broken heart no more
Davey cries Alicia's name as he's pushed against the floor
and a couple lonely kids throw their loneliness away
tomorrow's more than just another day.

Davey and Alicia
pledged to each their love
he felt good with her
and he's all she thought of
and Davey knew his head first dive was no mistake
what a difference another month can make

thirty pictures in a landfill
thirty pictures in his head
thirty memories of his ex
while he's lying in his bed
Alicia's got her smile
Alicia's got her frame
Alicia's got her laugh
but Alicia ain't the same

"I'm sorry I thought I loved you
but I really couldn't tell
I'm sorry that I've hurt you
but I've hurt myself as well"
And Alicia cried a cry that not a single word could cure
"I guess this makes me just as bad as her."

Unfinished Song

The weeks run short, the days are long
A broken heart, and unfinished song

And here's the part where I tell myself
I'm trying too hard for somebody else
I'll just keep dreaming of writing a song about you

Finish this line, I can't make it work
I'm doing fine, except for the hurt

Its been so long, this year is a blur
and I'm getting tired of thinking of her
holding me close and stabbing me so tenderly

Where are you hiding, my dearest unknown?
I wanna save you from being alone.

Can't see you coming, don't want you to go
and I'm the best man for you that I know
and I'll just keep dreaming of writing a song about you

Drinking Man's Ambition

I got a broken badge of courage
that I wear like a scar across my chest
I've got a drinking man's ambition
pick a single goal and forget about the rest

I'm gonna make it all up to myself one day
I'm gonna prove the devil wrong
Tell my cautious boy to get out of the way
like he's been listening all along

I've got an hour of incentive
before I sober up and put these thoughts to sleep
Might want to spend it on a message
Tell the little red haired girl that I'm sick of counting sheep

Contractual Obligation

I hope you're happy
with whoever you're making miseable
I hope you're satisfied
with the choices that you've made
I hope your life have given you
everything you ever wanted
I hope you don't consider
any of it a mistake

I remember
all the boys that followed you
I imagine
all the fun you must have had
I hope that all of them
finally found someone to love
I hope that losing them
doesn't make you sad

Here's the song I promised you
that I'd write so long ago
It oughta be the last of its kind
but you really never know

Its been a good long while
since I spoke a word to you
and I wonder if you're still the same
old girl I never knew

I hope you've grown up
into someone more responsible
I hope you realized
that happiness ain't free
I hope you've found a man
who wants to give you everything
I really hope he's done
a better job than me

Careful lies
Bring teary eyes
and long nights in their wake
Weekly weeps and lack of sleep
were more than I could take

And if you see those tears
through your older years
and you still have no regrets
Well then I hope you like assholes, dear
cos they're the only men you'll get

I've been lonely
thinking of how you made me smile
every time that I said
something that made you laugh
I've been getting bitter
thinking how I tried so hard
to win my way to the heart you didn't have

Here's the song I promised you
that I'd write so long ago
It oughta be the last of its kind
but you really never know

Its been a good long while
since I spoke a word to you
and I wonder if you're still the same
old girl I never knew

yeah I wonder if you're still the same
old playful little you

Toilet

Change of heart
Like changing your mind,
'cept you don't have to give me a reason why
cos its not your fault

I always fall in love
Every night when I'm lying awake to the sound of your voice next to me in my bed
In the morning I'll get over you again
Interrupted dreams with shattered hopes, looks like you'll never end

Stupid

Last Friday night went off alright
I met a cute girl named Jasmine
I looked at her, she looked at me
and we smiled in unison
but no sooner had I learned her name
my heart sunk like a brick
when her boyfriend came out of the bathroom
and kissed her on the lips

Well Jasmine seemed quite busy
so I left to get a drink
on my way I bumped into a stranger
and she said "pardon me"
well her voice was firm, her hair was permed
her lips were soft and thin
her eyes were brown, she's from out of town
and I'll never see her again

I go up again and down again
and up and then back down
but I'd rather deal with fortune's wheel
than stand on solid ground